A Churlish Disregard for Decency

03 Jun, 2012

Ahoy you gorbellied, bat-fowling strumpets! I found a collection of Shakespearean insults today and thought "What a marvellous d100 table they would make". So I slapped some numbers on the side and made one. Roll once on each column for instant classy comebacks.

Range	Column 1	Column 2	Column 3
01–02	Artless	Base-court	Apple-john
03–04	Bawdy	Bat-fowling	Baggage
05–06	Beslubbering	Beef-witted	Barnacle
07–08	Bootless	Beetle-headed	Bladder
09–10	Churlish	Boil-brained	Boar-pig
11–12	Cockered	Clapper-clawed	Bugbear
13–14	Clouted	Clay-brained	Bum-bailey
15–16	Craven	Common-kissing	Canker-blossom
17–18	Currish	Crook-pated	Clack-dish
19–20	Dankish	Dismal-dreaming	Clotpole
21–22	Dissembling	Dizzy-eyed	Coxcomb
23–24	Droning	Doghearted	Codpiece
25–26	Errant	Dread-bolted	Death-token
27–28	Fawning	Earth-vexing	Dewberry
29–30	Fobbing	Elf-skinned	Flap-dragon
31–32	Froward	Fat-kidneyed	Flax-wrench
33–34	Frothy	Fen-sucked	Flirt-gill
35–36	Gleeking	Flap-mouther	Foot-licker
37–38	Goatish	Fly-bitten	Fustliarian
39–40	Gorbellied	Folly-fallen	Giglet
41–42	Impertinent	Fool-born	Gudgeon
43–44	Infectious	Full-gorged	Haggard
45–46	Jarring	Guts-griping	Harpy
47–48	Loggerheaded	Half-faced	Hedge-pig
49–50	Lumpish	Hasty-witted	Horn-beast
51–52	Mammering	Hedge-born	Hugger-mugger
53–54	Mangled	Hell-hated	Joithead
55–56	Mewling	Idle-headed	Lewdster
57–58	Paunchy	Ill-breeding	Lout
59–60	Pribbling	Ill-nurtured	Maggot-pie
61–62	Puking	Knotty-pated	Malt-worm
63–64	Puny	Milk-livered	Mammet
65–66	Qualling	Motley-minded	Measle
67–68	Rank	Onion-eyed	Minnow
69–70	Reeky	Plume-plucked	Miscreant
71–72	Roguish	Pottle-deep	Moldwarp
73–74	Ruttish	Pox-marked	Mumble-news
75–76	Saucy	Reeling-ripe	Nut-hook
77–78	Spleeny	Rough-hewn	Pigeon-egg
79–80	Spongy	Rude-growing	Pignut
81–82	Surly	Rump-fed	Puttock
83–84	Tottering	Shard-borne	Pumpion
85–86	Unmuzzled	Sheep-biting	Ratsbane
87–88	Vain	Spur-galled	Scut
89–90	Venomed	Swag-bellied	Skainsmate
91–92	Villainous	Tardy-gaited	Strumpet
93–94	Warped	Tickle-brained	Varlot
95–96	Wayward	Toad-spotted	Vassal
97–98	Weedy	Unchin-shouted	Whey-face
99–100	Yeasty	Weather-bitten	Wagtail

May all your games be ruder for it.